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Fräulein Grenouille

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!Attention youse lovely UK people! [09 Apr 2008|11:22pm]
[ mood | hopeful ]

If I can only find somewhere to stay, I will be spending some time in ye olde England very soon (15-24 April). I was originally going to stay with Lionel but as he recently started seeing someone, I am not sure it would be such a grand idea ... I need to spend a few days in Northampton (looks like 19-24 April currently), but the rest of the time (15-19) I can spend elsewhere, so if anyone wants to meet up and has a bed/sofa/floor to spare, that would be most excellent! I will love you forever and ever. Also, I can cook.

Any offers ... ?

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[27 Apr 2007|05:25pm]
This is it. Matthew and I are either getting married this summer, or we are not ever. Unless things change, that is. And I truly mean it.

I am going to disable comments on this, not because I don't value your input, but because I am not ready to talk about it, and also we need to clear things up between us before any of it goes on here.

Thank you all.

[20 Apr 2007|06:47pm]
On this day in history ...
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[19 Apr 2007|06:31pm]
Good things today:

Several people commented on how lovely, beautiful and nice my jacket was - even random people at university whom I have never met before. (including a middle-aged man who said 'your jacket looks good'in a slightly weird, offhand way.) This is the kind of stuff that happens to Kathy all the time, not me. Well, the past year or so it has actually happened a few times.

Anyway. I was wearing: a pale yellow chiffony pink/red/green/lilac/turquoise/orange patterned dress with gold sequins on the neckline (it sounds worse than it is, but it did look a lot better on when I had the braids... maybe because I looked slightly more exotic?). With this I wore some skinny fit black jeans turned up over the ankle, with red (!) ballerinas with white and navy-striped ribbons. And the jacket. I am sure the cut has a proper name, but I can't think that I know it - it's a short, fitted red velvet jacket with a china collar and brass buttons and epaulettes. It is done up with hidden little hooks. I also wore my lovely amber and silver studs from Lithuania, a yellow necklace and a silver ring with a big pink stone. And my film star sunglasses. And my big red handbag.

Well, Kathy does this so much better - and I am tired because I had no sleep last night (for a 'good'reason, mind.) And I feel fed up with my clumsiness (that may well be down to tiredness today), since coming in from university I've spilt tea, dropped two cheeses on the floor (luckily they were in their plastic wrappers) and banged my little toe very hard into something (luckily it didn't FALL OFF this time ... that was unpleasant).
I was going to stay away from the chocs (have a gala ball to attend to in Edinburgh on the 5th and I don't watch out I won't get into my frock!)

The other good thing about today is that I handed in a very overdue assignment. At least one thing out of the way (and yes, I'm not sure how this is really possible at all, but it seems I still have a chance to catch up with all my work ...)

Well, this is so much more rambly than I intended, so I'll think I'll end it here. OOooh, by the way - I was greatly amused yesterday when I found a video on my mobile that I had no recollection of recording whatsoever. It's Matthew dancing to the Cheeky Girl Song. :O Hahahahaha.
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Gargantuan [18 Apr 2007|11:47pm]
[ mood | silly ]

For that is the word that has just entered Johanna's active vocabulary. ('My plan is to impress him suitably. And on recognising my gargantuan effort, he will hopefully bump my mark up.')

And yes, she is mightily pleased.

Whoops, another one for the records :P

3 comments|post comment

[14 Apr 2007|12:08pm]
Back in the UK. Rather uneventful journey.
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Only a silly test, but (dotdotdot) [09 Apr 2007|09:16pm]
DisorderRating
Paranoid Disorder:Low
Schizoid Disorder:Low
Schizotypal Disorder:Moderate
Antisocial Disorder:Low
Borderline Disorder:Low
Histrionic Disorder:Moderate
Narcissistic Disorder:Low
Avoidant Disorder:Very High
Dependent Disorder:High
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder:High

-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! --
-- Personality Disorders --



Avoidant, Dependent, Obsessive-CompulsiveCollapse )
4 comments|post comment

[17 Jan 2007|12:41pm]
I now have tickets to go and see Regina Spektor on 6 February. Wheee!
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Trying to focus on the positive [16 Jan 2007|10:39pm]
I lovelovelove Regina Spektor. The music, the lyrics, the voice.

Over the past 6 months her name has cropped up in various places on LiveJournal. For some reason, without really having heard the music, I had the idea that I would probably like her/it a lot. And I do. And it makes me smile. And if I can smile, I am still not in That Very Bad Place. And if I'm not there, maybe I don't have to go there at all.
14 comments|post comment

How to buy 3 body butters from the Body Shop for a total of £5.80 [13 Jan 2007|09:40pm]
[ mood | satisfied with purchase ]

1. Realise they are reduced from £12 to £6.
2. Realise there is a 3 for 2 sale on.
3. Take advantage of the £5 birthday gift on the discount card.
4. Take advantage of the 10% discount on my the discount card.

I picked honey, grapeseed, and avocado. The sale didn't apply to all body butters or I would have swapped the latter two for coconut and something else. Still very good, though! I've always refrained from buying them because of the price - £12 each seems a little steep in my opinion.

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Somewhere on the outskirts of Birmingham city centre ... [13 Jan 2007|12:03am]

street01
Originally uploaded by johanna n.
Distressing stuff going on, but I'll restrict myself to this photograph for now.
3 comments|post comment

Namesake [11 Jan 2007|06:18pm]
We've got a new lecturer/tutor for two of our modules and her name is ...dundundun... Johanna! She's got German blood rather than Swedish, though (she's lived in England all her life, I think). But her partner apparently grew up in Sweden.
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[09 Jan 2007|10:36pm]
As of last night I am back in da UK.
1 comment|post comment

Concerns [07 Jan 2007|10:01pm]
[ mood | concerned ]

I take less and less photographs. I don't really enjoy it anymore, (which I don't think is because I truly have no interest in it, but because of circumstances etc.) and mostly feel miserable about it. I feel very pressurised, and that makes it very hard for me to do anything, as I am scared of failing. (Although the latter could be true of anything, I suppose, not just photography).

I have been trying to tell myself that seeing as this year doesn't count towards the actual degree, all I need to do is to pass and as long as I do that, it's okay. BUT people then tell me that SURELY I have higher standards than THAT? I know that they say that because they think that I am capable of more than a 'mere' pass and also that they perhaps do not see why I try to have that approach, but it does make me feel even worse about the situation.

I don't know how to get round this - I've spoken to my tutors (last term) but it wasn't really that helpful in terms making me see things in a different light and feel differently about it all.

Maybe it's not for me. I told myself I'd do at least the first year. But I think I am really going to struggle. One of my weaknesses is that I can't make myself do something I really don't want to do,and it feels like I have already decided deep down that I don't want to do it, but that I don't quite want to admit that to myself. (Because that would be failure.)

6 comments|post comment

[07 Jan 2007|05:23pm]
I'm really unhappy about what's happened to my camera and at the moment it looks like I will probably leave it behind as I have a lot of stuff to take back to England and I will be pushing it with the weight limits anyway. Seeing as there are medium format cameras to borrow at university, it's not like I won't be able to use one in the meantime, anyway (if I do leave it behind I'll probably try and get it all sorted out at Easter, or at the very least bring it back to England with me).

I've done about 1/2 of the packing so far - or rather, I've put most things in the suitcase(s), but I haven't weighed them yet and I am not entirely decided on which things to bring and which things to leave behind ...

I've just had dinner (pancakes with whipped cream and cloudberry jam!) and am now sitting here with a cup of tea with honey in (for my throat). I'd better get back to the packing soon though, and I could really do with doing a bit of research for an essay later on as well.

Last night I had a dream that included leeneh and cats! I don't remember much else about it, though.
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Camera trouble... again! [07 Jan 2007|01:18pm]
I feel extremely frustrated right now. I may have well broken my Hasselblad just. I really can't believe I did this, or I can because I am about the clumsiest person on the planet. But aaaarghh! This could cost me a lot of money to repair. I think it's a case of the shutter having jammed, which isn't too uncommon in Hasselblads, and there are webpages out there on how to fix it. However, my Hasselblad is a bit of an unusual model, so those tutorials are no good to me.

My Christmas hols haven't exactly reinforced the idea that I really -should- be a photographer, and this is just too much right now.
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[07 Jan 2007|02:05am]
[ mood | stupid sore throat, stupid cold ]

Only one more day now :O :O :O

I don't normally have much separation anxiety, but ooooouch ...

3 comments|post comment

[05 Jan 2007|11:52am]
1. Woke up with a cold yesterday. Drinking lots of c vitamin (smoothie!) right now.
2. Because of said cold and because I feel seriously confused (but mostly, I think, because of the cold) I tossed and turned until about 4am. Ugh.
3. I could really do with some guidance and advice but I'm not sure who to talk to. Well, that's not entirely true - there are several people I could talk to, but as I don't trust myself to make a 'good' decision, I usually don't feel much wiser anyway.
4.Everybody complimented me on my dress yesterday, and my Mum did my hair really nicely. I might have some photos later, but it won't show well, as it's all at the sides and back.
5. I am dyeing my hair tomorrow. I'm expecting it to turn out sort of mahogany-ish.
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[04 Jan 2007|10:57pm]
Hello 24.
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[03 Jan 2007|09:03am]
[ mood | Mm, smoothie. ]

1. I bought lots of fruit yesterday, so now I am enjoying a mango, banana and blood orange smoothie.
2. I weighed myself this morning. Apparently I have only put on 2 pounds since I arrived in Sweden. Considering the extreme (and I mean it) amounts of food I have been eating, I am very (surprised and) impressed. Next week I should be back on track again, though.
3. I am meeting up with my friend Louisa for lunch in town today. I can't borrow Mum's car so I have to catch the bus. 33 SEK for a single, apparently. Oerr!
4. Birthday tomorrow. I don't have any exciting plans, but will spend most of the day at Mum's before having to dinner at Dad's with the family (grandparents, uncles, aunt + cousin) in the evening.
5. It snowed yesterday, but only enough to give the ground a light dusting. Pfft. It's -very- icy, though. Ice + rain = bad, bad idea.

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